Testimony, Part II

Good Friday, 2007...
Still anguishing after seeing my sins and having my soul laid bare before me (see Testimony, Part I), I was still convinced that I was eternally damned. Curled up in a ball in a pew at church for hours. Cried out to the Lord repeatedly, begging for forgiveness.

Just before three o'clock, a group of about 15 parishioners entered the church. The leader of the group gave instructions about something I could not make out. Then she turned on a recording of a song that they all sang together. It was so simple and beautiful that I sang it along with them. After they finished singing, everyone left, the lights were turned off, and I was alone again...I felt a little better, though, and soon left for home.

Several months later, I signed up to attend an ACTS retreat. I had been reading, and seeking, and hungering to know more about Jesus. I did not understand what I had been experiencing and was looking for answers. Each morning of the retreat we would wake up early and pray the Holy Rosary before breakfast. On the morning of the last day of the retreat, however, we met in the chapel and were handed a prayer pamphlet with instructions for praying the Chaplet of Divine Mercy. I was not familiar with this prayer. Our group leader stood and gave a brief introduction to the Chaplet. Then, he turned on a recording...It was the same simple and beautiful music I had sung months ago in the church!

"ETERNAL FATHER, I OFFER YOU THE BODY AND THE BLOOD, SOUL AND DIVINITY OF YOUR DEARLY BELOVED SON, OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST, IN ATONEMENT FOR OUR SINS AND THOSE OF THE WHOLE WORLD...FOR THE SAKE OF HIS SORROWFUL PASSION HAVE MERCY ON US AND ON THE WHOLE WORLD."

I cried like a newborn baby.

After this amazing weekend, I read everything I could about the Chaplet of Divine Mercy and tried to recollect everything that happened that Good Friday in church.

The first thing I realized upon returning to this church was that I had been curled in the fetal position right in front of the Image of the Divine Mercy.

The second thing I learned was that Jesus told Saint Faustina Kowalska to tell us to "say unceasingly this chaplet that I have taught you. Anyone who says it will receive great Mercy at the hour of death. Priests will recommend it to sinners as the last hope. Even the most hardened sinner, if he recites this Chaplet even once, will receive grace from My Infinite Mercy. I want the whole world to know My Infinite Mercy. I want to give unimaginable graces to those who trust in My Mercy...When they say this Chaplet in the presence of the dying, I will stand between My Father and the dying person not as the just judge but as the Merciful Savior."

The third and most awesome thing I learned was that the Chaplet of Divine Mercy is actually supposed to be prayed as a novena, during which prayers are offered each day for nine days for a different group of souls. The novena culminates in the Feast of Divine Mercy on the Sunday after Easter. What I found, though, is that the novena is to begin each year on Good Friday! Here is the text of the prayer that is to be said on this first day of the novena:

"First Day: (Jesus to Saint Faustina) 'Today bring to Me all mankind, especially all sinners, and immerse them in the ocean of My mercy. In this way you will console Me in the bitter grief into which the loss of souls plunges Me.'"

(Prayer) "Most Merciful Jesus, whose very nature it is to have compassion on us and to forgive us, do not look upon our sins but upon our trust which we place in Your infinite goodness. Receive us all into the abode of Your Most Compassionate Heart, and never let us escape from It. We beg this of You by Your love which unites You to the Father and the Holy Spirit. Eternal Father, turn Your merciful gaze upon all mankind and especially upon poor sinners, all enfolded in the Most Compassionate Heart of Jesus. For the sake of His sorrowful Passion show us Your mercy, that we may praise the omnipotence of Your mercy for ever and ever. Amen."

The Lord "inclined his ear" and heard my cries in the church that Good Friday! Even though I felt totally abandoned, He was right there the whole time. What an AWESOME GOD!

He has bestowed His grace and mercy upon our family so many times in the intervening months. I wish I could detail all the ways in which He has literally shown me He is right here with us. By the way, He is real. He is omnipotent, omnicient and omnipresent. He does know everything we have ever thought, said and done, and everything we will ever think, say and do (Think about that for a few moments).

He will answer us if we repent and call upon His Holy Name in sincerity...Call upon His Holy Name: JESUS.

I love you.

-Daddy